On taking a break

I deactivated my Facebook account.

I know, I know. I have, in the past, made fun of people who decided to take a “Facebook break.” I was scornful.  Silly me. Now I’m one of those people.

It’s not because someone offended me or hurt my feelings. I wouldn’t call it a fast.

My brain just feels cluttered.

I lived many, many years without contact with friends from high school, let alone the people I went to school with but barely knew.  I went years without hearing anything from people I went to college with, save the occasional bit of news in the alumni newsletter.

Some people did cross my mind from time to time, in a general “I wonder what they’re doing these days” sort of way, but basically, I didn’t feel any particular lack in my life.

And then Facebook came along. I joined in 2007 (I can’t believe it’s been that long!!), and it has slowly taken over my brain.  Like Kelly said in this post, it’s become a drug.  A drug I use when I’m bored, or want to escape my fighting children or the work I ought to be doing. A drug I use first thing in the morning, and often the last thing at night. A drug I downloaded to my phone so I would never be without it.

I’m the first to admit the positive aspects of Facebook.   I have made contact with dear friends whom I truly love, and the connection has been such that it feels like no time has passed.  I have also gotten to know some people from way back, people I didn’t know all that well then, and been surprised by how much we have in common. As a transient military wife, I’ve even found it a helpful, non-threatening way to grow a friendship that is just beginning (getting to know people through their posts, finding common ground).

And yet…

I find myself wondering if it’s worth it. By reconnecting with people from the distant past, what am I missing in my real life, with the real people around me, with my very real children?  And is it worth missing those things in order to know that so-and-so from high school got her hair cut today?

Before Facebook, I blogged more.  I wrote real words, in sentences, even.  Now, I’m more inclined to click “like” on a witty post and move on.  Scanning down the page, not caring about so many of the posts, just wasting time and cluttering my brain with information I don’t really need.

So, I’m taking a break.  I’m going to work on some frustrating behavior issues with my girls. I’m going to read to Emma more.  I’m going to spend more time in the Word and in prayer, seeking to transform my wicked, selfish, impatient heart into a heart more like His.

About waymel

Navy wife. Homeschooling mom. Adoptive parent. Pianist. Introvert. One who loves quiet and beauty.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to On taking a break

  1. Jen says:

    Bittersweet. Because I understand. And now I know that y0u understand why I did the same thing awhile back. BUT I will miss your updates.

  2. Tim Church says:

    I was thinking about this today. I have spent all of 2011 away from FB… Yet Mom told me this AM that she saw I had become “FB Friends” with someone… I have no connection to/control over that account, but it still exists.

  3. Robyn says:

    I could see how it would become overwhelming. I look forward to more blog posts!

  4. loveandkate says:

    I totally understand this! I’ve never deactivated, but I’ve definitely taken days off. Especially when I get a cluttery brain. I plan to take all of 2012 off so I don’t have to read anything political. Ha! I’ll miss your updates, but am looking forward to more blogging!

    • loveandkate says:

      Uh, I wrote that response yesterday. And I promise I clicked “post comment.” But just now when I was commenting on your grant post, it asked me if I wanted to post this one? Ummm…yeah?

  5. Mary says:

    I left a comment about this on your Facebook and promptly realized how foolish that was! I completely agree and started to feel– for awhile–almost obligated to read,comment, etc. While, as you said, I could have been reading,playing, or just being with my “very real children.” I love reading your blog and have especially enjoyed your alone time posts, as I am kind of living vicariously 🙂 through your alone time. Thanks for sharing!

  6. Becca says:

    I guess I didn’t read this post when you first wrote it. You always seem to say exactly the thing I feel. I look forward to reading more of your great posts. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s