Discouraged

This adoption journey has been a long one.  We decided to adopt in July 2010, and chose Ben from a waiting child photo listing in August.  Many piles of paperwork later, in April 2011, our home study was approved.  At that point we were able to do the official referral paperwork for Ben, which went to Korea April 25, 2011.  On paper, there is a short wait after that.  The emigration permission (EP) is submitted, approved a few weeks later, and off the happy parents go to meet their child.

But it doesn’t really work that way.  We – and many other families – still wait. This is a good explanation of the situation, if you’re interested.

We still owe just over $4000, and have promised to pay it by the end of the month.  We certainly don’t want to get to the point where they want to submit Ben’s EP but can’t because we still owe fees!  We have been hoping to hear positive news from the two grant applications that were scheduled to be reviewed this month.  Last night, though, we found out that we will not receive anything from Gift of Adoption.  The other grant we have out is with Show Hope.  They are so well-known; I don’t really expect to hear from them.  Every grant organization gets applications from way more families than they can help, I know this.  Understanding the situation doesn’t make it any less stressful.

We have been hoping to travel in March.  Hoping wildly.  Our home study expires in April.  If we don’t travel by then, it’s more paperwork, more money.  And another month – how many more? – of not being with Ben.

Parents on our agency’s forum keep an “unofficial waiting list” – a chart showing the important dates for all the families who participate in the forum.  It’s a helpful way for us to track where we are compared to the other families, and to calculate possible dates for the next thing on our list.  There are 9 families ahead of us on that list.  These are just people with our agency, remember, not at all indicative of how many actual families are ahead of us.

And so far this year, there’s been no news.  No EP submissions for any of those families.

And yet, as Wayne keeps saying, anything could happen.  They say, sometimes, things are done out of order for reasons we are not told.  Maybe Ben’s paperwork will get pushed up in line (I know, unfair to others, but I’m sure we all secretly hope for this).  Maybe the Korean government will get tired of all this backlog and just push a ton of kiddos on through the system at once so they are caught up.  Wouldn’t that be nice? 🙂

Pray for all the families who wait.  And pray for us to be able to pay this last amount, so that our paperwork is not held up.  Pray for us to rest in God’s timing and provision.

About waymel

Navy wife. Homeschooling mom. Adoptive parent. Pianist. Introvert. One who loves quiet and beauty.
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6 Responses to Discouraged

  1. Jennifer says:

    I can only imagine how stressful this us for you. Your family will be in my prayers. God knows what’s best when it comes to getting Ben. There’s a reason for the delay. I really enjoy your blog by the way…

  2. Jen says:

    I will pray.

  3. Jerusha says:

    My name is not Jen(nifer), but I too will pray….unexpected favor upon you and on Ben. I sympathize with your discouragement, friend. 🙂

  4. shirley wilmoth says:

    I hear your discouragement and stress but God has no limits and I’m praying. Love you.

  5. nicole says:

    praying fervently! from one discouraged, waiting mama to another…He knows our hearts desires, He is near.

  6. Rebecca says:

    I, too, will just pray and hope they do things out of order. And that $4000 just appears out of nowhere:)

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